In a world cluttered by social definitions of what it means to be a “Boss” to “Lean In” and to be on your “Grind” Sunup to Sundown, one day you may find yourself on a cycle of social expectations of “Who you should be”, “What should want” and “ How you should show up”. Year after year living up to these expectations will take you further away from the most authentic version of yourself.
Has this already happened to you?
On a daily basis you may find yourself buried beneath a pile of false identities, all the while denying the version of yourself that really wants to be seen and known for “who” you are and not just seen for “what” you do or should be doing with your life?
If you’re feeling this way, you’re not alone!
Women from different ethnic backgrounds, business sectors and religion, allow themselves to get lost in a Tsunami of social and cultural expectations. The end-product?
Resentment, comparison, anxiety, depression, unfulfilled personal and professional lives!
Therefore, if you’re tired of living on a roller-coaster of false identity and you desire a more balanced life where the “real” you, the “essence” of you shows up for herself, ask yourself the following 6 questions to discover who you are and what you want out of your life!
Question # 1. What Do I Really Want?
Get clear about where you’re currently at in your personal and professional life. Are you thriving in these areas of your life or have you allowed the voices of other people to curate your life’s desires and goals? Be gentle but honest with who and what you’ve allowed to control your life.
Question # 2. Am I selling Myself Short?
Do you find yourself consistently showing up to personal and professional spaces where you don’t feel valued, energized or inspired? Did you take a job for less than what you should have agreed to take that job for? Do you remain in a relationship with a partner who fails to respect your wants, needs and desires? Being honest about selling yourself short is important for your overall mental, emotional and physical health.
Question # 3 Do I Compare Myself to Other Women?
Comparing yourself to other women is not only ineffective at helping you build your self-esteem and confidence, it can create barriers in your mind that prevent you from reaching your personal and professional goals. Therefore, the next time you find yourself comparing yourself to another woman, gently ask yourself, why don’t you see the value of who you are and what’s special about yourself? Your authenticity is truly your superpower.
Question # 4 Have I Done Enough for Myself?
Do you make promises to yourself about what you’re going to do for yourself but you always put other people’s needs before your own and don’t follow through on the promises you make to yourself? If this is you, the next time this happens, ask yourself, “What keeps me from doing more for myself”. Don’t judge yourself, instead, be honest and loving but be real at the same time.
Question # 5 Am I happy with Where I am Today?
Being too busy can keep you from truly acknowledging where you are in your life. Therefore, turn off social media and the notifications on your phone for at least 30-minutes one day per week and take an assessment of your life. Determine if you’re where you want to be. If the answer is no, do an audit of why you aren’t where you need to be and create one action-step needed to help you arrive at your desired destination.
Question # 6 What Inspires Me?
What inspires you? It’s an answer that can only be answered by you and one that requires you to give yourself the space and grace to change what you want and do in every season of your life. What inspired you in your 20’s and 30’s may not inspire you in your 40’s and that’s just fine. You have the power to change your mind and the power to choose yourself!
Be Bold and Get To Know Yourself !
As a woman on a journey to self-discovery, it is essential to your mental, physical and emotional health that you give yourself the time, space and the resources you need to bodily explore who you are and what you want to do with your life. Be bold to confront people and places that no longer serve you and be committed to stop playing small. My workbook “10 Days of Inner Discovery-Creating a Path Towards Emotional Healing, Forgiveness and Self-Love” is a great place to start on your self-discovery journey where you’re guided to ask hard but necessary questions that will lead to a better understanding of who you are, why you believe the way you believe and what is stopping you from showing up authentically yourself!
Laticia “Action”Jackson-CEO and Founder of N-powered Coaching Academy
